My main take away from the countless articles I have read is to do it your way and do it how it works best for your little one and your family. I have done things I swore I would NEVER do, like put the potty in the family room, and also not done things I thought I would do.
Right before Everly's first Birthday we bought a potty seat. The main reason for buying while she was so young was because we wanted her to have a good experience with her potty seat, and ease into liking it. I have seen too many times when parents wait until their child is "ready" aka: about to head to preschool in a week so they must be potty trained this weekend, and its traumatizing for the child who is being forced to do something they don't want to do. Sometimes the Mom is pregnant again, and the last thing she wants to do is follow a toddler around reminding them when to pee and cleaning up messes when they have and accident. Almost everyday we would put Everly on the potty. Sometimes it was while I went potty, or right before her bath, or right when she woke up. We didn't make a big deal about it but just said "Everly wanna go potty" and put her on there and read a book. Once she was done, because most of the time she would pee, we gave her 1/4 of a Gerber Arrowhead cookie. We were so excited! She was really going on the potty. She still didn't understand, and it was all by chance, but she was doing it. The bad part was she started associating the potty with bath-time, and with getting a cookie. So sometimes she would say "potty" but really she wanted to go take a bath or just to have a cookie.
What did we learn from this (when it comes to Everly):
- Having the potty chair in the same bathroom as the tub she bathes in, was not a good idea.
- Giving her a cookie each time was not a great idea either.
- Getting the potty chair early was a GREAT idea because she loves it, and since it makes a sound when she pees she knows she did it and gets very excited.
- Only having her potty on the chair here and there was maybe confusing for her.
What did we decide to do? Well about 4 months later we decided to just stop. We removed the cookies from the drawer, closed the potty so it was just a stool she used to stand on to brush her teeth, and began looking for "ready" signs, so we could plan a weekend to REALLY potty train.
Common readiness signs include:
- Pulling at a wet or dirty diaper.
- Hiding to pee or poop.
- Interest in others' use of the potty, or copying their behavior.
- Having a dry diaper for a longer-than-usual time.
- Awakening dry from a nap.
- Telling you that they're about to go, are going or have just gone in their diaper.
Around 18 months, Everly began pulling at her diaper, playing with its content (YUCK!), always hiding behind the elliptical to poop, mocking potty behaviors such as wiping, and telling me "poo poo" after she went. All of these where enough signs for us that she was ready to at least "try." I always was tired of cleaning up after a poop mess after the dirty diaper was pulled off. Her pediatricians recommendation was potty train or add more layers of clothes so she cant get to her diaper. We tried the layer until we came to a free weekend, where we knew one of us could remain home all weekend long.
At 20 months and 1 week that weekend came along. We purchased some awesome training pants from Aribaby designs, which I highly recommend, and planned out our weekend. Saturday morning we decided she would remain naked from the waist down, with the exception of leg warmers and socks, because its super cold this weekend. We put her potty chair in the family room, and agreed Ipad and TV time would be extremely less restrictive during this weekend. We also set the expectations low, and all we agreed on was that we stay tough and not give in until the weekend was over, be happy when she goes on the potty, and not get angry when she doesn't, and that we would rejoice in how clean our floors would be after a weekend of spot cleaning.
Day one is over and things went as expected. As soon as Everly woke up we got her naked from her waist down. At first she was confused why she had no diaper on, but quickly warmed up to the idea. Then we watched her.....like a hawk! Everywhere Everly went Mommy or Daddy went too. We tried to get her to sit on the potty as often as possible. Whether she was watching TV, playing the Ipad, or reading a book, if she was sitting down it was on the potty. During nap we did put a diaper and pants on her just because we had already cleaned up so many messes and only had one successful potty trip. After nap, off with the diaper again. Saturday evening Mommy and Daddy went on a date night late, and Everly went to her Mimi's to play. During this time she had her PJ's and a diaper on.
Sunday morning we woke up and stripped her down again. She started out not wanting anything to do with the potty, but eventually she sat right down and peed, then popped up and said "potty!" Brian and I were elated! We thought maybe she was getting it! No worries though in less than an hour she peed on the floor again. The difference on day 2 from day 1 was that now when she had an accident she would say "potty," and point to the puddle, then run to her seat. SHE WAS STARTING TO GET IT!
Hoping the rest of today goes well, and that tomorrow there is more progress. Did I mention our child who normally poops 3 times a day has not gone since Friday.......
